Pathological demand avoidance—a clarification

After I shared my first PDA article, I received quite a few comments explaining why "regular" demand avoidance and "pathological" demand avoidance are different. And that PDA is not a survival response to unmet needs like I was suggesting.

Many of the comments argued that it's not about underlying unmet needs, but then mentioned things like safety and autonomy as they tried to explain why PDA occurs.

So, I feel like I need to clarify something.

Safety and autonomy ARE needs. Human needs. And as I continue to say over and over again, autistic needs are human needs.

Autistic needs include things like safety, security, autonomy, belonging... and many other things.

These are not needs that are unique to autistic people. But autistic people ARE more likely to have those needs become unmet, and our threshold of tolerance for them going unmet is much lower. 

We become triggered... anxious, overwhelmed, and even mentally incapacitated much more quickly than nonautistic people.

So, when I say rigidity and demand avoidance aren't actual features of autism and are instead survival responses to underlying unmet needs, safety and autonomy are two of the needs I'm referring to.

So, when people say that PDA isn't a response to unmet needs, but then refer to things like safety and autonomy...

They're actually making my point.

Autistic people who are showing signs of PDA are doing so because their brain is telling them they are in danger in some way. Physically, mentally, emotionally....

And because autistic people have a lower tolerance for those needs not being met... we push back when demands trigger our survival response. 

We refuse. We appear defiant. We appear rigid. We appear stubborn. Some of us even move into fight mode and appear aggressive (I'm referring to "aggression" that is defensive and reactive).

The way I see all "problematic" autistic behavior (which is not caused by or compounded by other conditions) is that they are all the result of underlying unmet needs. Which, again, are human needs.

And I have not yet encountered a single example of a behavior that doesn't have a possible explanation related to underlying unmet needs.

To be clear, this is a philosophical discussion. I cannot and am not speaking in absolutes. Just explaining why I don't think autistic demand avoidance, the kind being referred to as PDA, is pathological.

It's a sign. An important one. A real one. One that should be treated with urgency and care.

But it's not happening because autistic people are "just wired that way."